Guess who has been having more fun than Kate Middleton and Barack Obama combined?

Not that I am complaining, but it has been snowing for the past few days and weeks and months here in the Rocky Mountains.

Luckily, for what is left of my sanity, last week at this exact time I was on a boat in the Caribbean sea, deep sea fishing drinking beer.

Incidentally, I brought my favorite deep sea fishing beer drinking buddy with me.

This guy.

 I got to spend every waking and sleeping moment with Matt for an entire week! In the heat!!!

The view was stunning.

The pace was slow.

The beer was plentiful. 

(ohyeswedid!!)

The beaches were sandy.

 The cars were colorful.

The palms were fruity.

The sunsets were sultry.

And, of course, the nuts were hot!

AND . . .

THE MOST EXCITING PART?

The sleeves, pants and socks were missing.

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My dad happens to live on this tiny island of Cozumel far, far, far from the bitter cold! Convenient, I tell you.

Matt and my Dad

We got to visit him and his wife, Alma, and pretty much live like royalty for a week. I know it is going to sound like bragging if I tell you that they own a sports bar with the best food on the whole entire island. But I am just stating the facts.

 The King and Queen.

The Duchess and Duke.  

Incidentally, this is the first year that we were not called "honeymooners" by the street vendors.  Ha! I guess we are getting old. 

(The Duke was referred to as Mr. Whiskers though).

ADIOS AMIGOS

Holiday Mush

I had a delicioso 5 days with my smoochie pie Matt. I am sure that he was glad to go back to work today after being my non-stop elf/diet coke fetcher. haha, BTW, I love that man : )

We had a fun Thanksgiving with family and friends and I kept my vow to not get stressed out. Last year half way through dinner I had to run the store for a pack of Lucky's. Well not really but that is what we say around here when we are stressed out to the point of running away. That reminds me, now that we have been married forever, I have taken to saying to Matt "remember that time" without actually referring to a time or event. I just let him go through his memory to find an applicable situation to relate to. I really am lazy.

After the house was empty Friday morning and all the dishes were done, we started putting up the tree. It is a fake. The reason: my house is surrounded by real pines and I don't need a fire hazard in my house. Besides, I like to over accessorize my tree and you can't put up nearly as much crap on a real tree.

If you have a fake tree, I highly recommend this candle.

mandatory cute dog photo (cant help it)

 We left the bottom 2 feet off our 12 foot Christmas tree this year. Am I starting to exercise restraint in my life?

I love going through all the sentimental crap.

Matt and I were married by Elvis. This ornament was from our first year together.

Matt's baby shoes.

Chase's baby shoes

Uh, mom, why did you not save my baby shoes? I had them right?

One of Chase's ornaments from childhood (this one is from 1996)

Chase's childhood Christmas books. I swear I get teary eyed taking these things out of boxes every year!

Normally my friend Elizabeth comes over and helps me with my tree. This year she decided to be a meanie and go to California for the winter. Despite this unfortunate turn of events, Matt and I were able to finish in a record 6 hours (though I have to say Elizabeth is never the drill seargent that Matt was. holy dictator batman!)

Just some of the many, many, many decorations I have collected over the years. 

last year we had a party and I did not have any mistletoe, so I made this banner instead (lol).

I will spare you the bathroom and other details : )

oh and I finally purged the nativity scene and crosses from my life. I am too damn old to fake my beliefs (but I will always believe in Santa Claus).

In other holiday news, Chase went shopping on Black Friday and brought me home this as an early Christmas present.

YAY FOR ME!!!

So that meant on Saturday and Sunday, I baked with the help of my new toy.

Sunday after we took the dogs for a wintry walk, we did a puzzle (or part of one).

Lori's Diet Log Sunday November 28, 2010

4 cups of coffee

3 small cinnamon rolls !

2 diet cokes

1/2 loaf fresh baked bread !

3 coors lights

Cheers!

Skip the house with the middle age lady and yapping chihuahua

Happy Halloween! Besides my damn gray roots, further proof that I becoming a hag is that I have not bought any candy to pass out to the kids. I was seriously planning on just shutting off the lights and drinking beer in the dark. However, since Matt and I were invited for a little get-together at a neighbor's house, I now have a legitimate excuse not to pass out treats. (FYI--I am wearing an orange t-shirt right now if that makes me any less of a Halloween ghoul).

My sweet in-laws came up to the mountains yesterday and we all  got to hang out. They brought me some fabulous birthday gifts (that's the perks of being the only girl. my mother-in-law and I are treated like the queens that we are). Anyway, I wont brag about all my fabulous gifts, but one of them may or may not have been this bowl.



Someone knows that I have a serious dish fetish. 

Last night I had a dream that in addition to all the wonderful b-day gifts that I received,  my mother-in-law (Judy) left me a $50 bill under a cup "to go shopping." In my dream I told her "oh Judy, you gave me so much, you didn't need to give me any money."  Her reply was "well you better buy something for Matt. It is not all about you, you know."  HAHAHA. We all got a laugh out of that. That is the last thing that she would ever do in real life.

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Chase works as a waiter/bartender at a popular place in our area.  He decided he was going to dress up as a milkman last night for work.

So he bought a bow tie. I mean a real bow tie that you have to tie. And  he spent forever trying to figure out how to tie the damn thing.

He finally figured it out.  I think he looked pretty authentic.

He can't put the phone down for a picture?

I don't know if he carried those bottles around all night or what? I asked Matt this morning. "What are the odds that Chase returns my basket?"

Matt gave it a "less than zero."

So funny story about tying a tie. We lived in Dallas when Chase was in middle school and he was playing football at that time. In case you haven't heard: the state of Texas takes football playing Very Seriously. In 7th grade, his football coach made it clear that on Monday's game day, the boys were to wear a shirt and tie to school. Serious business. So the weekend before the first game, we went to Penney's and bought him a shirt and tie. Of course I did not know how to tie the damn thing, so I told Chase that he was going to have to get on the internet and figure it out. He did so without a problem. (I guess the bow tie is a little trickier).

That first game never happened because that day was September 11, 2001 and all events were cancelled.  There were, however,  plenty of other tie-wearing occasions that came to pass.  Flash forward three years to 2004.  Matt and I were getting married in  "we are getting married" clothes. Luckily my son knew how to tie a tie because my soon-to-be snowboarder husband had never really needed to wear one and had no clue: ) That is a sweet memory.

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In case you are wondering at all.

I mastered the Moo Shu pork. I was really worried about those pancake things, but they were simple.

It was all the damn chopping.   Waaayyy easier to call Bamboo Garden. Oh and I learned that Moo shu is Mandarin for "wood ear" which is the type of mushrooms that are in the dish.  Anyhow, I made Moo shu on Friday for my mom's birthday dinner (our b-day's are three days apart) .

Happy b-day Mom (if you still read my blog) and thank you for the wonderful b-day gift that you gave me : )

Lending a beauty hand

My adorable niece Mia started cosmetology school in Denver last month and, of course, I was recruited to be a model.  Okay, I was really just part of her test,  but the instructor did refer to us guinea pigs test subjects as "models" so I am going with it.

Anyway, on to the program.

 "Warning" sign upon arrival.

Look,  here comes Mia. 

Oh, hai Mia. (I told you she was adorable).

Me:   Cute boots! 

Mia:   Aunt Lori, it is so weird living in a place with actual malls and a Ross.

(Poor little mountain child)

Mia tells me I will be the first real person she works on.  She is so OVER slutty Becky.

This is slutty Becky.

(ummm, they still teach perms???)

First order of business. A facial. 

I may or may not have gotten Miss Mia in trouble for talking during an exam during the facial part. 

(I will never tell).

On to the manicure. 

Mia doing her best Mrs. Swan.

Mia's classmates. (I think cute hair was a prerequisite to get in this school).

Wait a minute. 

What is this?

I may need to borrow this hand for Halloween.

(oh and I think my modeling days might be numbered if I don't stop yaking and playing with the props).

Hold up.

That creepy hand was nothing

Check out the back of Mia's car.

All kinds of Slutty Beckys rolling around.

Truly frightening!

 Well that's all folks.

BUH-BYE!!

(And a BIG thank you to Miss Mia for the facial , manicure and fun)

Memory Card Dump

This post promises to have no point. I am going to clear out the memory card from my camera (and my brain) from the last week and throw it all out at you.

So this is what has been going on.

I made a pie last Tuesday.

It looks pretty good right? I even made the crust. Well,  it did not taste that great because everyone had one piece and that was it. Bad sign. I threw it away on Sunday. It was a peach/blueberry pie but I tossed in some leftover craisins to get rid of them. I dunno,  maybe that did it,  or maybe with all the nutmeg and cinnamon -- it just sort of tasted like pot pourri.  Does anyone buy pot pourri anymore? Remember when you had little dishes of that stuff all over the house? Well, I have a recipe if you need it.

I know I showed you all the crap I bought at the FIRC last week. Here is a picture from my front porch utilizing some of my finds. Oh and I seemed to have forgotten all  about my giant bin in the garage labeled "FALL CRAP." I got it out and then suddenly felt overwhelmed and took it back to the garage.  I don't watch Hoarders. Is this how it all starts? Please tell me no.

So what did I do on Wednesday even though I had been to the FIRC on Tuesday? I went again with my sister-in-law, Mo.  I know what you are thinking. I sure do have a love/hate relationship with my sister-in-law.  The fact is,  I have two sisters-in-law. I should give them labels so you know which one I am talking about. One is the semi-normal, Mo (that was a joke to see if she is reading) who lives down the street and then there is the other s-i-law (who somehow got out of hell on a visitor's pass) that lives out of state. I don't ever talk to that one.  Anyway, the point of all that is that I took this picture outside the FIRC.

I thought they were butterflies, but Matt tells me they are moths. Whichever they were, they sure liked this yellow bush (or is it a shrub Mr. Know-it-All?).

Our niece, Sierra,  came over after school on Friday. She is an Ugg wearing nut.

She is also artistic and drew a mural on my chalkboard.

 

 
Can you read that notation on my chalkboard? It says "FACIAL W/ MIA"  I know you are thinking;  that I am pretty fancy.  Well, I am. However, I have never had a facial. My niece, Mia,  is in beauty school down in Denver and I am going to be some sort of class project. 

In addition to Friday afternoon, Sierra also spent Saturday evening with us. My mom is down in Texas,  so Matt and I were back-up babysitters. Sierra brought her own chocolate fondue fixings. I am not even lying. She must have heard about that pie.

Matt and Sierra had a "who can eat the most chocolate covered pound cake contest" and I think Sierra won!

I don't know why these pictures are so blurry. I was not even drinking. Not even Coors Light.

Notice they ate all the cake but there were plenty of strawberries left over.

Finally, as a parting gift, I would like to present Murph recovering from a Sierra hangover (he loves her).

Ciao,